Embracing my Mom Body

I have not always been self-conscious about my looks (besides the normal teenager stuff). I had a great body 2 years ago. I was a size small, 32 C, I wore a size 2 in pants, and had 6 pack abs. Then I got pregnant with baby number 2. My son is a blessing in my life, but after having him, I was so self-conscious about my body.

When I had my son, I went from a size small to a size large. I could barely fit into a size 8 dress for my Mary Kay events. I went up to a 36 DDD (yes, I was breastfeeding, but still it is hard to be that big up there). I was told by everyone that I looked great for just having a baby. “Most people would kill to be a size 8 right after having a baby.” Well, not when just 9 months ago you were teeny tiny. I know it sounds vain, but I am putting my feelings out there, so NO JUDGING!  I watched girls who went back to a size zero 2 weeks after having a baby. It was hard. I cried in the dressing room trying on clothes for months. I wasn’t big by any means, I was just different.

I have now gone down to a size 4 and wear a small/medium top. I am proud of where I am now, so I thought, “Hey! I am going to wear a bikini this year.” Joe responded with, “You wore a bikini last year, so what is the difference?” The difference?? Last year was a high-waisted bikini. This year is a real, legitimate skin showing bikini. So, off to Academy we went in search of the perfect bikini. I tried on suit after suit and was so dissatisfied with what I saw in the mirror each time. “I only need a few more months to get my body ‘bikini ready’. But by then, summer will be over. I might as well not even buy one.”

I wasn’t upset with the bikinis, but the way they looked on me (and the sizes on the tags). I was in an XL top and medium bottoms (reminder: 2 years ago I was a size small). So, we went home without a swimsuit and I cried.

And then started the self-induced body shaming. I have belly flab. My skin has so much cellulite on my belly. And my back fat is terrible. Don’t even get me started on the stretch marks on my hips, butt, and sides. All of those bikinis dug into me in all the wrong spots.

It boiled down to one thing… a society that teaches body shaming. I wasn’t really scared of wearing my bikini. I was scared of what others would think of me while wearing it. We have made body shaming a popular trend and now everyone is scared of what others will think of them.

Then, I started thinking, why am I really so upset with my body? It carried 2 beautiful children into this world. I am older than I was when I had Izzy. I am not large by any means. My skin just doesn’t bounce back the way it used to. The stretch marks really aren’t that bad, and they have faded a lot. The sizes on the tags don’t matter, I mean I am still breastfeeding (hence the XL top on my medium figure). I am happy with my body. Why can’t everyone else be?

We loaded up in the car and went to Academy, again. I decided I would not leave that store without a swimsuit. Izzy wanted one too. She tried on like 40 of them and with each one, she admired herself in the mirror, totally in love with what she saw. She bounced around giggling and talking about which 10 she liked the best! We finally narrowed it down to one and she loved her choice.

Great! My turn… I stood there looking at the dozens of choices. I picked 4, maybe 5 to try on. Iz went into the dressing room with me. I tried on the first one, a strapless top. It dug into my chest and made my back look bulgy and weird. It was awful. I was embarrassed to have her in their witnessing this. “Oh, Mama! It looks beautiful!” “Really Izzy?? I think I look like a cow. Haha!” So, I tried on the next one. “Oh gosh! This one is worse than the last.” Izzy remarked, “Your butt won’t fit in that one! Hahaha!” My pride hurt a little. So I tried on the next, which I really liked. “Your back is lumpy in that one. And I see your boobs. Heeeheee!” Ouch!

I tried on one after the other and listened to Izzy’s comments get worse and worse. I finally decided on one and I was ok with my choice. It was the one I really liked, but then Izzy’s comment made me kind of regret my love of it. I couldn’t be mad at her though. I taught her to react to my body that way. I taught her to react to every body that way. She thinks that is how you are supposed to view yourself. I didn’t realize that until after I finally left the store.

I am here to say, let’s stop this cycle. Let’s stop worrying about what others will say and think. Let’s bring back confidence. Let’s instill our daughters with positive body image and confidence. Let’s bring back the thought that every single body is a beautiful, unique creation. If you are not happy with you, make sure that is your decision and not someone else’s.

You have a stunning body. Make sure you step out at the lake, or the beach, or the pool, or wherever that bikini takes you with confidence and say “Screw You,” to anyone who wants to take that confidence from you. My body isn’t perfect, but it is mine and I am proud of each stretch mark and cellulite dip!

It took my 8 year old body shaming me over some swimsuits to realize that something has to change. And it begins with us.

Bikini

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Summer Adventures- Lake Time,sunsets, camping, and fishing

We have already completed a few things on our amazing Summer 2016 Bucket List! WOW!! There are 2 types of people in this world; Lake People and Pool People. We are definitely LAKE PEOPLE!! Don’t get me wrong, I like any type of water, but I really LOVE the lake!! I could spend my whole life at the lake!
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We do a lot of camping all over the place, but our favorite place is the Belle Starr Recreational Area at Lake Eufaula! It is beautiful, the bathrooms and showers are clean, there is a stunning view from every single RV spot! It is AMAZING!
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We went fishing, and really didn’t catch much of anything by the campsite, so we went to our secret fishing spot and caught a few little Crappie but hey, it was something (and kept Iz entertained)!

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We also got to watch the most beautiful sunset while we were fishing one day! It was magnificent!
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What is your favorite place to camp in Oklahoma? Have you done any camping yet? Drop a comment and let me know what you think!

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SUMMER 2016 BUCKET LIST!

Summer is here! Sunshine and heat means playing in the lake and pool!

So, everyone knows how much I love my bucket lists!! The Summer Bucket List is by far my favorite though!! I thought I would share it with all of you! I also have a cute printable version available for download at the bottom of the page! Check out my “SBL” journey in the links on this page!!!

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  • Go to the lake
  • Visit the Farmer’s Market
  • Roast Marshmellows
  • Go Camping
  • Tye Die Shirts
  • Go on Road Trips
  • Outdoor Movies
  • Catch Fireflies
  • Make Homemade Lemonade
  • Play with Sidewalk Chalk
  • Go to a Water Park
  • Watch Fireworks
  • Ride on a water slide
  • Have a BBQ
  • Make Rootbeer Floats
  • Eat Snowcones
  • Watch a sunrise
  • Watch a Sunset
  • Go to a Festival
  • Go on a Picnic
  • Go fishing
  • Go to an Outdoor Concert
  • Wash our car (with waterhose)
  • Go stargazing
  • Go to the movies
  • Eat at a food truck
  • Go to a beach
  • Make a huge slip and slide
  • Go to a Rodeo
  • Make memories!!

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I hope ya’ll have an amazing summer! What would you add to your family bucket list??

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Fall Bucket List

Here is a FREE Fall Bucket List I designed!! Please feel free to use this or share it on your blog (as long as you link it back to me)! Download is below!!

Fall Bucket List

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Spring and Summer Bucket List: Visit Botanical Gardens

On April 18th, we went to the Myriad Botanical Gardens in Oklahoma City, OK for Journey Church’s Good Friday in the park! It was such an amazing experience and the gardens were beautiful! They have done so much to make it look beautiful out there! They have a really neat park for the kids to play at and are adding new stuff all the time! We got to eat from the food trucks that were out there for the celebration and listen to music! I am not sure if the stage they had out there was one that is always there or if the church provided it, but it was a pretty spectacular set up!! We had such a great time at the Myriad and hope to go back there this Summer! I checked out some of the fun stuff they have going on there this summer for kids!!

Spring and Summer Bucket List: Visit an Amusement Park

So, on April 12th, we went to Frontier City Theme Park in Oklahoma City!! We went for the MCDA Spirit Fest (a cheer and dance competition) with my amazing dancers who managed to pull out three 1st place wins and one 2nd place win!! It was an all around great day, except the fact that I got badly sunburned, only on the left side of my body :(. One thing we did to save money was we brought an ice chest to keep in our car with snacks and drinks. We were super thirsty at the park, so we bought one souvenir cup (which was $12.00 approx and you got $0.99 refills) and split the drink into separate cups which was twice as cheap!! We did not buy any food from there since a hamburger was around $8 and was disgusting from the bite I took out of a friend’s sandwich! It was a nice day and the lines were not too bad even with a cheer competition and a band competition going on! They also have some great concerts going on this summer that I know we will be back for!! Overall, we had a wonderful time!!

Spring and Summer Bucket List

I am so in love with this beautiful Spring weather we have been having however, I am not liking the tornado talk today :(. I decided to write a fun post about the great stuff we are going to do this spring and summer! I love traveling and doing lots of fun stuff, so please join me in completing this list! (The ones in Bold are completed)

  • Have a Bonfire
  • Attend an Outdoor Concert
  • Go to a beach
  • Lie in the grass
  • Catch Fireflies
  • Go Kayaking or Rafting
  • Get a Tan
  • Take a Road Trip
  • Go to an amusement park
  • Make Ice Cream
  • Go to a Drive-In Movie
  • Have a Picnic
  • Make a Summer Playlist
  • Play in the Sprinkler
  • Watch Fireworks
  • Host a barbeque
  • Stargaze
  • Go Camping
  • Eat Popsicles
  • Visit a Farmer’s Market
  • Get Fit
  • Make new friends
  • Take More Pictures
  • Explore my home city
  • Volunteer
  • Go Night Swimming
  • Plant a garden
  • Go Four-Wheeling
  • Do Something Bold
  • Try a new recipe
  • Do Karaoke
  • Sit poolside all day
  • Have a water balloon fight
  • Go to a parade
  • Go to a Festival
  • Start a DIY project
  • Go to a water park
  • Go to 3 lakes
  • Go to a car show
  • Visit Botanical Gardens
  • Go on an epic date
  • Take a Day Trip
  • Eat outside
  • Be spontaneous
  • Go fishing
  • Play in the rain
  • Travel somewhere we have not before
  • Take a painting class
  • Visit a berry farm to pick berries
  • Have a girl’s night in
  • Visit a tea room
  • run in a color marathon
  • eat a sno-cone
  • visit a zoo
  • Get a pedicure
  • find a waterfall
  • see a lighthouse
  • root beer floats
  • play in a creek
  • go to a flea market
  • feed ducks
  • go to a splash pad
  • visit an aquarium

I am so excited about all the fun stuff we are going to do this Spring and Summer! I will make new posts for each item and check them off the list as we complete them!

 

Stay Chic Everyone!

Spring 2013 Bucket List- Go on a trip

So We went on a dance trip to Broken Bow, Oklahoma! It was so much fun! I cannot believe how amazing my dancers did! Izzy got to perform her solo and 2 group dances! It was a wonderful bonding experience for all of the kids and we got some new people to join after we showed them pics of our trip! We had a blast and look forward to going to the Footloose Festival this weekend in Elmore City, Oklahoma!!

The Sydney's Art in Motion Dancers!

The Sydney’s Art in Motion Dancers!

3 of our Dancers getting lunch at McDonald's!

3 of our Dancers getting lunch at McDonald’s!

Fun in the Dressing Room!

Fun in the Dressing Room!

Dancers on the way to Broken Bow!

Dancers on the way to Broken Bow!

Dancers on the way to Broken Bow!

Dancers on the way to Broken Bow!

 

Stay Southern Ya’ll!!!

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Our Spring 2013 Bucket List

Here is the Fancher Family Spring 2013 Bucket List starting on March 10th! We hope to have all of these completed by May 1st.

  • Plant Flowers
  • Pick Fresh Berries
  • Blow Bubbles
  • Play in the Rain
  • Have a picnic
  • Fly a kite
  • Go for a bike ride
  • Feed the ducks
  • Go to a tea room
  • Go to the Azalea Festival in Muskogee, Oklahoma
  • Shop at the Farmer’s Market
  • Celebrate Easter & St. Patrick’s Day
  • Visit a State Park
  • Go to a family cookout
  • Visit a museum
  • Try all 25 sonic shake flavors
  • Go on a vacation or trip

So, here is our list for Spring 2013. I look forward to sharing our Spring adventures with you!